The reason I ask this, is because I went on this “date” with this girl. I drove about an hour north to go meet her. We had been talking online and things seemed to be going well. But when I met her, she seemed stand offish, and at the end of the night, there was this awkwardness about kissing her. I told her that I’m not really an aggressor type and that I don’t generally make a first move unless I know it’s ok. She said it was, so I kissed her.
But then she hasn’t spoken with me again. So I’m confused. She seemed to like me, and encouraged me to kiss her. But now? Nothing.
Do girls really expect us all to act like Shane off the L Word or something? And be all cocky and act like a player? Is this what girls really expect butches/FTM’s to be like? Because sorry, but if that’s the case, I’ll be highly disappointing. I abhor Shane’s character.
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If You Met A Butch Lesbian, Or An Ftm, What Typical Masculine Qualities Would You Expect Them To Have?7 comments to If You Met A Butch Lesbian, Or An Ftm, What Typical Masculine Qualities Would You Expect Them To Have? |
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To be honest, it sounded like the chemistry that you had online wasn’t really there in person, at least not for her. (This is all my opinion) She probably “let you kiss her” because she didn’t want to hurt your feelings (or didn’t have guts enough) to say no that she’d just rather be friends. If I was you I’d move on, it sounds like this gal just wasn’t meant to be for you. Good luck & hugs!
Also…all girls DO NOT expect a butch woman to act like that. I’m super femme & I actually made the first move on my ex, who was quite butch. (as well as several other “first moves” on her but I don’t think I’ll elaborate!)
So you had a bad date, it happens, a lot. I would expect that a butch would have short hair, no makeup, and some men’s fashions. But even that’s stereotyping. If a girl really expects you to be Shane, I would hope they would tell you that before you meet them.
There are no rules are there?? The whole idea of being butch/FTM is to express the real you and abandon rules.
Maybe she was looking for a one night stand? Or maybe a time waster?
Im from Australia and Shane looks like a femme lesbian to us here. LOL
Im FTM and I suppose people dont know what to expect. maybe they either think we are butch lesbians with more facial/body hair, or they think we are soft men. I fall somewhere between the two probably lol.
I have met women who thought they liked the idea of an FTM but when they met me they went right off it. you could just tell. But all i can offer in advice is just keep meeting women all the time and dont discount lesbians as some of them really like FTMs and the queer bent types like us as men, not as women.
I had that problem to I was single for a whole yr until I met Jamie. how our date went wen we first met was kinda funny. we went back to my “place” (it was a lil apt off from my parents house at the time I paid rent from it but any way). we were watching better than choclate talking to one another and flirting when I thought it was rite I leaned in to kiss her she backed off and said can I help u??? I looked at her shocked and I was scared like o **** maybe she didn’t see me like that. I said to her I wanna kiss u and she just looked at me and then she kisssd me and on thing let to another….
Just be more confedent keep ur head high u’ll find someone or that person will find u as in my case. my messenger is ayden_boi_84@yahoo
People started telling me I was like shane a long while ago, before I even knew who the hell shane was (totally thought it was a dude). I finally looked it all up a while ago and I realized that I had been called a serial heart-breaker. It’s true girls are attracted to that character, cause I’ve been called attractive many times. People just seem to grow obsessed though, and it’s just not a fun trait I guess. (it’s not like I try being a player)
Just be yourself and stick to whatever you believe in, you’ll find the right person. The person that doesn’t dig the “shane” type people.
Good luck.
So are you the butch, or was she? The last girl I dated was a butch, and while she made some moves,s he told me she likes the other person being the aggressor, so I was happy to oblige. ITs tough to say though, why she hasnt called.
oh ok. I suppose she could have expected you to perform the “man’s” role & be all aggressive like Shane, but hey if thats nto who you are, and she can’t accept it, then you can do better.