Plenty Of Fish.why Do People Keep Their Account Open When They Date Someone?

I met a nice man in mid July. I found him on the dating site Plenty of Fish. We been dating since we met. I see him approximately every 1-2 weeks. He tells me he likes me a lot. He used to call me 2-3 times daily. Now, he calls me 2-3 times per week. I also like him a lot. He is the silent type, doesn’t say much about himself. I found out he kept his Plenty of Fish account active. I also know that he checks that account regularly. I wonder why he still has an active account on a dating site. I don’t want to be naive and stupid as it is clearly a sign that I am not the ONE. That hurts me quite a bit. I am also out of touch with dating in 2009. For those of you with experience with online dating web site, I would like to get your opinion. What do you think is going on?

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6 Responses to “Plenty Of Fish.why Do People Keep Their Account Open When They Date Someone?”


Lauren R February 9th, 2010 at 6:10 am

I also use Plenty of Fish. I’ve met several men on there with a few resulting in relationships. I’m currently in a relationship with someone I met on that site. I closed my account, mainly because if he and I break up, I’ll be taking a break from dating for a while. My boyfriend’s account is still open. In my opinion, I’ve had the most success from Plenty of Fish.
Here’s the thing, he said that you are a dear FRIEND. This means that you two are friends, and that is probably why his account is still active. It sounds like that’s all he sees you as. I think if here was really interested in you, he would probably make an effort in spending time with you. Maybe you need to tell him that you want to spend more time with him. Also, if he is calling you less frequently, that may his way of saying “I want to be friends and not be exclusive.” I could be wrong though. If you don’t want to get hurt, maybe you should ask him exactly what he wants…:)

skyflyer February 9th, 2010 at 10:30 am

Obviously he is keeping his options open in case he finds something better or the two of you don’t work out. Problem is, you don’t know what’s going to come first.
If you are serious about continuing a relationship with him, let him know how it makes you feel and ask him to suspend his account. If he feels the same way, he’ll do it.

kj February 9th, 2010 at 3:00 pm

Yeah it sounds like he’s still looking or keeping his options open, especially if you guys only see each other every couple of weeks and talk less often. He might think the connection between you two is fading or maybe he expected to see you more often.

Shai Hulud February 9th, 2010 at 6:59 pm

It’s not uncommon to be dating more than one person at a time in the real world. I think you’re looking into it too much. People have to keep their options open.

Bob February 9th, 2010 at 7:44 pm

Sounds like he is playing the field.

Anonymous February 10th, 2010 at 1:19 am

At least you met someone. I’m pitiful at online dating. Been doing it for eight months and outside of the Nigerians trying to get my credit card on the Yahoo personals, I only met one person who would communicate back to me on eharmony, zero at Christian mingle, and adventure dating is also a goose egg zero.
The girl at eHarmony quit writing after a week. Said she wanted a cuter guy. She even put it up on her Myspace and face book accounts.
As far as this guy goes, he probably kept the account open just to see if anyone else is interested in him and is more alike. Let him know you know about the account and talk to him. Try to see if you guys have anything else in common. Maybe that will make him turn his attention back to you.



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