ive been dating this guy for almost 7 months now. we live in two separate towns and barely get to see each other.and were not old enough to drive yet.we talk alot online and on the phone.any tips…
Hiya. Um, bit of a long story.
Basically, I met this guy online back in about…March 2008? He owns this forum and we didn’t talk very much until it was his birthday in June, I made him a youtube vid just saying “Happy birthday =D” and stuff, I didn’t really think anything of it until he commented on it and said that I looked nice and thankyou very much. I don’t know what happened but I suddenly found myself blushing like mad. As the days went on, I became more and more attached to him, I don’t know how it happened, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him and suddenly found myself falling in love. I *knew* it was love as I hadn’t felt as strong as this about my previous relationships. I asked him if he would like to meet up at the end of July and he came down here for the day. He lives in London and I live in Peterborough. The train Journey isn’t too bad, it’s just that it costs alot. I’m having my driving test soon so hopefully I can pass that and it would cut down on having to use public transport.
Anyway…When he came down, we just clicked, everything was PERFECT. His kisses were the best and he had such nice hugs. We had a chat about whether to move into a relationship but he sad “I’d love to ask you out but I’m not sure…” He’d previously been in a LDR with a girl who lives in America, they never met but it ended with a bit of a bang because of the distance. I feel that from what he has told me about his previous LDRs has knocked his confidence in them. I have had quite a lot of LDRs myself, except for my last one. I tend to feel quite comfortable with LDRs because it’s really exciting going to see someone after a time.
Anyway, he also wanted to keep what we had secret online. He didn’t want his ex to find out who is also on the forum we talk on, he thought that it would hurt her so I was like “Fair enough” even though it hurt me so much. But, I was happy that I could still act like a couple with him, even if it was secret.
However, this weekend, I went to a convention in London to meet up with him for the second time, and I met with some forum friends aswell. It was really good and I was allowed to stay at his house over night and travel back home on sunday.
When we were at his, we began acting like a couple again and were kissing but then he paused to say something like “I’m not sure whether to go any further” and I replied “Whatever you want, I want”. He said he would like to stop and I accepted that (he is a Christian, so, his thoughts on intimacy are slightly different to mine). But then we went into a very detailed and in-depth discussion about us. We started talking about school and what comes after that. We have this year left at school and then he goes off to University, I am not going myself. He said after Uni he has another course in order to get the career he wants. He also said “apparently you find the one at University”. And I have to admit, when Uni comes into the picture, most LDRs break apart, it happened to my brother.
Anyway, he said he wasn’t sure about us dating because he will be in education for so long and it would take a while for us to be able to move to the same location together. He went on to explain I was worth everything and I was too good for him but because of Uni and the distance, we should move on. That included stopping the kissing and intimacy when together and also how we act online together. This broke my heart, I was fine hanging onto what we had even though it was secret…he said that we were neither commited nor non commited which I agreed with, but I don’t want to look for anyone else, I want to wait for him…am I sounding too desperate? I truely would do *ANYTHING* to have him. I even went to Church with him and his family in the morning. It actually taught me a good lesson, but I won’t go into that.
I need some advice, please can you help me? It’s tearing me apart. It all feels like a bad dream. When I’m with him, I just feel so happy, we get on so well like we’ve known each other 5 years even though we’ve met twice.
Thanks,
Kat xox
OK so I met a guy from a Christian dating site back in September. We are both looking for the same thing. A serious relationship leading to marriage. We spoke every day until we met on January 4-7. I went to see him where he lives. He paid for my ticket and everything. While I was there we discussed marriage, and everything. Since I came back he has called me every day, and texts me during the day as well. We had planned on me going to see him on February 15-18 and were going to be buying my ticket today. (well he was paying). Anyhow he is an aircraft mechanic and for the past week he has been away on work. He has called me every day even though he has been in Mexico and Florida. Yesterday he called me at work and was being very sweet, but said that he had a little bad news for me, but also good news. He has been trying to get on with a larger company and finally got an interview with one. He has to fly somewhere for that, and would not have enough right now to pay for my ticket and the ticket he has to buy to go and his hotel etc. He asked if we could postpone for a few weeks. I was a little disappointed, however tried to not let him know as I am happy about the possible new job. He said that he is excited because if he gets the job then he would have his flights paid for and he could come here and see me more often.
He was also talking about marriage and stuff, and things to do with the future. He then had to go as he was boarding his flight to fly home. He said he would call me as soon as he landed to let me know he was home. He said, since he is my future husband he wants to let me know that he is safe etc. and where he is all the time.
I knew when his flight got in (and confirmed online), and he never called me. I waited a while (an hour and a half) after his flight got in and tried to call him. First the phone rang and rang and went to voice mail. So I left a message and waited a while longer. He also has a work cell, so about 45 mins later I called that and it was turned off. (it never is), and then I re-tried his personal cell, and that was turned off also now. I left a message there and said that I was concerned as I had not heard from him and his cell was turned off which I mentioned also concerned me. I asked him to call me today. He has not. I just texted him about 1/2 hour ago and made it light and said hello and hoped he was having a good day. Still nothing.
This is WEIRD. I am not getting this. I am holding off calling him at the moment. I want him to call me. I don’t want to seem like I am freaking out. I mean if he was trying to “break it off” with me… would be have been talking about marriage and stuff yesterday? And how the new job could help US?
I am lost here and need some advice or reassurance or something. I don’t want to jump to conclusions with him and seem like a freak, but it feels like something is wrong!!!
OK so I met a guy from a Christian dating site back in September. We are both looking for the same thing. A serious relationship leading to marriage. We spoke every day until we met on January 4-7. I went to see him where he lives. He paid for my ticket and everything. While I was there we discussed marriage, and everything. Since I came back he has called me every day, and texts me during the day as well. We had planned on me going to see him on February 15-18 and were going to be buying my ticket today. (well he was paying). Anyhow he is an aircraft mechanic and for the past week he has been away on work. He has called me every day even though he has been in Mexico and Florida. Yesterday he called me at work and was being very sweet, but said that he had a little bad news for me, but also good news. He has been trying to get on with a larger company and finally got an interview with one. He has to fly somewhere for that, and would not have enough right now to pay for my ticket and the ticket he has to buy to go and his hotel etc. He asked if we could postpone for a few weeks. I was a little disappointed, however tried to not let him know as I am happy about the possible new job. He said that he is excited because if he gets the job then he would have his flights paid for and he could come here and see me more often.
He was also talking about marriage and stuff, and things to do with the future. He then had to go as he was boarding his flight to fly home. He said he would call me as soon as he landed to let me know he was home. He said, since he is my future husband he wants to let me know that he is safe etc. and where he is all the time.
I knew when his flight got in (and confirmed online), and he never called me. I waited a while (an hour and a half) after his flight got in and tried to call him. First the phone rang and rang and went to voice mail. So I left a message and waited a while longer. He also has a work cell, so about 45 mins later I called that and it was turned off. (it never is), and then I re-tried his personal cell, and that was turned off also now. I left a message there and said that I was concerned as I had not heard from him and his cell was turned off which I mentioned also concerned me. I asked him to call me today. He has not. I just texted him about 1/2 hour ago and made it light and said hello and hoped he was having a good day. Still nothing.
This is WEIRD. I am not getting this. I am holding off calling him at the moment. I want him to call me. I don’t want to seem like I am freaking out. I mean if he was trying to “break it off” with me… would be have been talking about marriage and stuff yesterday? And how the new job could help US?
I am lost here and need some advice or reassurance or something. I don’t want to jump to conclusions with him and seem like a freak, but it feels like something is wrong!!!
Additional Details
42 minutes ago
**** It should be noted HE is the one who was talking about marriage, and wanting to move things forward. He has been talking about where we will live, and all those types of details. This is not something I have brought up. He has told his whole family about me, and I have spoken with some of them on the phone…. and his friends as well. When I went to visit him, he sent pictures of us together to his family etc.
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